The Gift
by kurisu christina
Summary: My take on what Buffy thought during her last minutes of life, and what happened at her funeral. Did Angel come? How did Dawn, Willow, Xander, and Giles remember her? Horrible summary, the actual fanfiction is better.
1. Buffy's Gift

**Dsiclaimer: I do not own Buffy the Vampire Slayer or any of the characters or concepts.**

Chapter 1

I had to get to her.

I was struggling up the metal of the rickety tower that threatened to fall at a moments notice. I had to find Dawnie, my little baby sister, the one that had been screaming my name from above when I came. Now all I heard was the screaming. I had to keep going. Just because Glory was trashed (thanks to my handiwork) didn't mean she didn't have people working for her. She was a god, after all.

When I reached the top of the uneven metal staircase up the tower, I saw Dawn tied up at the end of the walkway like that guy in X-Men. I never liked that movie, and now I disliked it even more. That was my Dawnie, not some random person. Some weird old man was cutting into her stomach with a knife, making her bleed and cry. He was going to pay, and I was going to make sure Dawnie was safe no matter what it cost.

She looked up and saw me. "Buffy!" she screamed, tugging against the ropes.

"Dawn!" I raced towards her.

"This should be interesting," the old man said, and five seconds later, I passed him, and he was hurtling to his deserved death.

"Here." I reached out and started untying the roped that bound here to two metal poles. My fingers fumbled numbly, but I managed.

She gulped. "Buffy, it hurts." Blood was streaming from multiple cuts in her stomach, and blood dripped off her toes into the air. It hurt me so badly I couldn't breathe.

Pulling the last of the ropes away, I said, "I got it, come here." I wrapped my arms around her bony frame and held her close, hobbling to the end of the walkway. "You're gonna be okay-"

Whoosh.

Oh, crap.

Below us an immense orb of crackling energy had expanded from nowhere, and lightning crackled from it in every direction. "Go!" I ordered Dawn, pushing her ahead of me. She froze.

"Buffy, it's started."

Some tall and official building got hit and suddenly looked like it was a huge alien house. Demons poured from every direction below. Another flash and I could make out cars crashing and swerving to avoid the sudden fissure in the street. I thought I heard someone below scream, "Anya!"

I looked into my sister's eyes. She shivered.

"I'm sorry," she said.

I didn't want her to be sorry; I wanted things to be okay, and I wanted her to be okay. "It doesn't matter."

She stared back at me, then tried to dodge past and run for it. Thank goodness for Slayer reflexes. "What are you doing?" I demanded, pulling her back by her arm.

"I have to jump. The energy-"

"It'll kill you!" Horror rose in my chest as I realized what she was saying.

"I know. Buffy, I know about the ritual. I have to stop it," she said. She looked ready to run the other way, but she pulled her arm away and steeled her face like she was about to try running to her death again.

"No." _Never! Dawnie, I'm not going to lose you again! I can't lose you again, _was what I wanted to say, but I just couldn't. I grabbed onto her as the tower bucked from the portal's wind.

She cried, "I have to! Look at what's happening!"

The portal, quiet for the past minute, crackled and shot out some sort of dragon into the air. It roared in triumph, stretching bat wings and catching the updraft. A dragon. That was going to be hard to kill. Luckily, it wasn't interested in us and circled the tower twice before flying towards the bigger city.

"Buffy, you have to let me go. The blood starts it, and until the blood stops flowing, it'll never stop. You know you have to let me," Dawn said, gulping. "It has to have the blood."

That sounded like something I'd heard before. I stared hopelessly at Dawnie's tear-streaked face.

"_It's always got to be blood," Spike had said at the meeting earlier. Blood was what fed him and kept him alive, and it was what made us do thing we couldn't understand, he said._

_Dawnie crouched on the floor, terrified, her arm and hand covered in blood were she had cut herself with a kitchen knife. I reached up and touched the place above my heart where Glory had stabbed me, bringing my hand back down and joining it with Dawn's. "It's Summers' blood. It's just like mine."_

_Back in the meeting, only I was talking. "She's me. The monks made her out of me." I thought to how I could hate her and love her, and how holding her made me safe. I couldn't hurt her. I couldn't let her die._

_In the desert, the first Slayer grinning at me eerily, her face painted beyond recognition and her body hunched over with old age. "Death is your gift."_

"_Death…?" I asked. All I could offer others was death?_

"…_is your gift," she finished, nodding._

_But now it made sense._

But now it made sense.

I turned around and looked out into the sky for the last time. The sun was just starting to rise above the clouds, lightening the sky. It made what I had to do less hard. I turned slowly and tried to say something to Dawn.

"Buffy…no." she said firmly, realizing what I was going to do.

I just couldn't argue with her, not now. "Dawnie, I have to."

"No!" she started to cry again, heaving and sobbing, tears tracing little paths through the grime on her face.

"Listen to me, please, there's not enough time," I begged, holding onto her shoulders. "Listen!"

She was still crying, but she looked up. I took a deep breath. How do you tell your sister not to be upset when you're going to die? What do you tell her to make it better?

"Dawn, listen to me. Listen. I love you. I will always love you. This is the work that I have to do," I began, holding back my own tears as she cried harder and looked away for a fraction of a second. _Come on, Dawnie, you're strong. You can do this._ "Tell Giles... tell Giles that I figured it out, and... I'm okay." Giles. More than anything I wish I could've said goodbye to him. He tried so hard to be everything for me. He loved me and kept me safe. He gave up his job and everything else he had to protect me.

"Give my love to my friends. You have to take care of them now. You have to take care of each other. You have to be strong." My friends. Willow, Xander, Anya, Tara, and, yes, even Spike. I could remember the first day I met them, when I ran into Xander and dropped all my stuff, when I asked Willow for help because she seemed nice though Cordelia hated her, when Anya came and, according to her, granted Cordelia's wish of a Buffy-free Sunnydale (was that a fun story. I can't believe that some alternate universe version of me was like a runaway or something), then reversed it and became human. When Spike ran over the "Welcome to Sunnydale" sign and terrorized and mesmerized me at the same time. Angel. I couldn't think about Angel, not with what he'd have to go through. At least Mom wouldn't have to suffer from me dying. I was going to see her at last.

"Dawn, the hardest thing in this world is to live in it," I continued, shaken from my momentary, second-long reverie. "Be brave. Live."

What else was there to say?

"For me."

I leaned forward and gently kissed her cheek. When I pulled away she was shaking with sobs and silently begging me not to, but I knew that she would be okay. I turned and ran the length of the makeshift metal walkway and took a swan dive into oblivion.

The surface of the portal was like an ocean of live, crackling electricity. My body was on fire. I twisted and opened my mouth in a silent scream, mind going blank. I could hear the scream of demons and other horrible creatures from whatever dimension they lived in. Every nightmare was open to my mind, every demon able to crawl into my world and kill it.

Slowly things became darker, and my body numbed. I felt it stop with startling suddenness, and sank into an endless pool of white and calm and safety and love.

They were safe. Dawnie would be okay, and so would the others.

And I was free.

**A/N: So, what do you think of my very first fanfic?**


	2. Aftermath

Chapter 2

My body trembled as I sobbed. She was gone. She was really gone.

How could she be gone? Buffy was everything to me, even if I had technically known her for a few months, and not years, like I thought. She had loved me and protected me, even when I gave her every reason not to. She took care of me after Mom died, and before that she had comforted me at night when I cried because Dad had left. I could remember her running away after she killed Angel, and I had spent the summer crying, hoping she would come back. She was my hero.

I tried to see what was happing. As far as I could tell the portal was gone, because I could no longer see the flashes of light. The sun was rising. I barely registered the fact that I hadn't eaten in nearly two days, and didn't care. I had to do something. I had to move, to get off this tower before something came to kill me.

Eventually I stumbled my way down the criss-crossing stairs of the tower, trembling whenever they shook in the breeze. _Breathe in, breathe out, breathe in, and breathe out. _I had to stay calm.

At the bottom of the tower demon bodies were strewn across the ground, but what caught my attention was the others. Giles was walking towards something, horror dawning in his eyes. I heard Willow sobbing, and saw that she was with Tara. Xander held Anya, whose head was bleeding badly. Spike was howling in misery, crumpled on the ground the hide his face. _At least he's okay._

Then I saw her, Buffy was lying on a pile of rubble, a peaceful expression on her face. She looked like she had just gone to sleep. _Oh no oh no oh no all my fault all my fault all my fault…._

I couldn't move or breathe, and my heart was pounding. It was all my fault, I should have stopped her, should have jumped, should have done anything but watch her die. I wasn't real anyway. All my fault….everyone was crying and heartbroken, and it was all my fault. I was stupid, I was an idiot, I was so selfish!

_Can't think, so scare, so alone, I'm going to die again and again and it's all my fault I'm stupid I should be dead it should be me it should be me why can't I die now? I want to die, I want to be dead, why can't I be dead, please help please, someone help, I'm going to die—_

I think the first person that saw me was Spike. Maybe. I couldn't tell, I was shaking so hard and crying.

"Dawnie?" he was hoarse from crying. "Bit, are you all right?"

The mantra in my head was pounding on and on. I could barely hear him. "All my fault, all my fault, all my fault…" I gasped. I needed to breathe.

Tara gently lowered sobbing Willow to the ground with Xander and Anya, who had sort of collapsed or something. Willow was beside herself with grief, and she held onto Xander like her life depended upon it. Giles was a little stunned or something, because he barely turned his head when I spoke again. Spike couldn't seem to move.

"All my fault." I rasped. "Let her jump. All my fault."

"Dawnie, sweetie, are you okay?" Tara asked softly, taking a few hesitant steps towards me.

I didn't really hear her either, or care. I crawled towards Buffy's body until I was only inches away. If only I could die and she could come back. I reached out and touched her face. She was cold, like Mom when I had gone to the morgue because I couldn't believe Mom could be dead. I realized Tara was behind me.

"Dawnie, we have to leave, ambulances are coming. We're going to have to go soon."

"My fault." I whispered.

A hand stroked my hair hesitantly. "Dawnie…please. We'll make this better, please get up."

Giles joined her. "Dawn, you can't do anything, it's too late." His voice cracked on the last three words.

Willow, pulling herself up, nodded. "We h-have to go." Sirens were whirring in the air. There must've been a lot of hurt people for all those sirens to be wailing, all those ambulances racing off to cart away the other bodies. That was my fault, too. "Dawnie, w-we have t-t-to go."

Soon there was a flood of people I didn't know. They asked all sorts of questions I didn't understand, and they took Buffy away to the morgue. They kept saying things like, "I'm so sorry for your loss" and "you should get home and get some rest. You'll feel better in the morning" but I knew it was all lies. I wouldn't be able to sleep, and if I did there would be nightmares without Buffy to wake me up and tell me it would be okay again, that we would get through somehow. Then when I finally woke up and it was morning I would feel so much worse, because Buffy wouldn't be there to tell me to hurry or I would be late to school and did I want to get expelled? But she couldn't, not ever. Never, ever again.

Spike saw me sitting on a pile of rubble while the police talked to Giles, Willow and Tara started to cry again, and Xander pretended to be all strong and manly for Anya while really crying.

"Hey, little Bit." He said, limping badly as he made his way over and settled down next to me. "Are you okay?" as an afterthought he added, "I know you're not okay in the sense that your sister is gone forever, and I know you won't be for a bloody long time, but are you hurt? Did the Doc hurt you?"

"He had a knife." I admitted. "And I'm not okay. But I'll be fine."

"You're covered in blood, I can smell it." He said. Vampire senses are creepy some times, I can tell you that. No wonder Buffy—

And we're back to all the fear and terror again. For a second I had been annoyed and a little creeped out, but it was painful again.

"Niblet?"

I realized I had started to cry again. "Nothing. Sorry."

"Maybe you should see one of the medics." He suggested. No, no way. Doctors and stuff were all clean and white and they had knives like Doc had. I hoped he was dead. He had fallen pretty far, but so had Spike, and Spike was sitting next to me.

"No." My head felt a little clearer, but everything else was numb. I couldn't feel the cuts on my stomach and chest any more, even though I could see rivulets of dried blood on my legs and feet. Not like it mattered.

"Bit—" Spike started to say warningly.

"I know, I know." I interrupted. "I swear that I'm fine…ish. Fine-ish. No need for big scary medical people with sharp stuff or anything."

At my last words he raised an eyebrow. "Scary medical blokes?"

"Y-Yeah."

"Dawn, what did the Doc do to you?"

I shook my head. "I don't want to talk…I just need to sit, and…think. I need to make sense of everything. I need to breathe again. I have to not die."

"You're not going to die." said Spike. "And I've found breathing highly overrated, though my case isn't the same as yours."

"We're all in shock." I told him. "And when it hits it's going to hurt. Spike, I don't want it to hurt. Buffy won't be here too…."

"Comfort you? Make everything alright again?" Spike winced as he stood. "Believe me, pet, all the Scoobies want that. Buffy kept you lot together through everything."

"Yeah." I said. I remember everything that never happened. "When I was little she used to look after me at the park and make sure I didn't fall when we went to her ice skating lessons. When she was called as the Slayer I was the only person she told. Then we moved to Sunnydale, and there was Angel—" Spike winced again, "—and the Master, and I was so scared that when he rose we would die. She never told me about the prophecy until waaayyyy after and it still scared me." I paused. "I think maybe I thought she was invincible. She died that one time and came back. I was always safe. I mean, I never even saw a real vampire up close until I was like fourteen. She made sure they never got near me."

"Of course she did." said Spike. "She loved you."

"D'you think she would have done that if I had really been there?" That was one thing that always bothered me. All the fabricated memories had seemed so real, and still did. What if I had been real, would Buffy still have loved me like she did?

"Yes." Spike said, completely sure of himself. "Buffy would have loved you no matter what."

It hurt so much to hear her name. It was better just thinking about all the memories, whether they were real or not. "Yeah…I remember when you first came, too. Buffy was freaked out half the time, she kept talking about the Slayers you had done in."

"Did she now?" that seemed to impress Spike.

"Oh, yeah." I choked out, feeling like I was about to cry again. "Absolutely. And then when you finally left or disappeared or whatever she felt like it was safe again. Then Angelus…" I remembered how much she had cried. "I think it was after he had messed with her and written that message in blood…no, it was after he came for her and almost killed Willow at the high school. I was in bed when I heard her shut the front door, and then she came into my room. She was crying so hard, and she just walked to my bed and collapsed. She cried all night, and fell asleep with me. I never felt worse for her than I did that night, because I knew she was going to have to kill Angel. I knew it was her duty as the Slayer, and it majorly sucked."

Before I knew it I was sobbing again, sides heaving, crumpled to the ground. Spike was somewhere above me, awkwardly patting my back. I wanted her to be there so much I thought maybe I could will her to be there. "Buffy! I don't know what to do, it's all my fault, all my fault…"

_I'm all alone and scared, why can't I breathe whenever I think about Buffy, why isn't she here I need her so much don't I matter Buffy I need you I'm going to die it's all my fault and I don't want to die but I'm going to someone help someone help someone help!_

I realized I was screaming at the top of my lungs, and someone was holding me close and saying something.

"Dawnie, baby, it's okay. Dawnie, please, it's okay, it's okay!"

"Should we move her?"

"Bit, I'm right here."

"Dawn, you need to breathe, you're going to pass out."

The last thing got my attention, and I slowed my breathing, just thinking _in, out, in, out _until my chest wasn't so tight and I could open my eyes. Tara was holding me, Spike stroking my hair, while the others were gathered around. A medic looked over curiously.

"Dawnie?" Tara asked me, concern written all over he face. "What happened?"

"I…" I didn't know what to say. "I need her back and I got scared and then I couldn't breathe." That had to pass as an answer that made sense, because I had started to hyperventilate again. "It's o-okay, really."

"Most likely a panic attack." Giles said. "In response to whatever happened with the Doc-"

I think Spike could feel me tensing, so he shook his head quickly. "You know, she probably needs something for those cuts." He added, motioning to the ripped fabric of my ceremonial dress Glory had given me.

Oh, no. Glory.

"Did Glory—is she—is it safe?" I stammered. Tara soothing petted my head, hugging me.

"Something heavy attached to the tower fell on Ben." Giles said quickly. "He's dead, and Glory cannot return."

I didn't feel the least amount of guilt. "Good."

Exactly two hours and ten stitches later (thank goodness most of the cuts weren't deep) I was back home, curled up on the couch with Spike hovered nearby and the rest of the Scooby gang dispersed around the house. We were supposed to go to the morgue later tomorrow, and the medics had told us to go home for the rest of the day and try to sleep. I knew Tara and Willow were already upstairs and asleep, and Giles, Xander, and Anya sounded like they were drunk or crying in the kitchen, I couldn't tell. Possibly both.

"How you feeling, Bit?" Spike asked for the hundredth time. I shrugged.

"Well, I'm not crazy for all the needles and stuff they used to stitch me up, 'cause, you know, sharp stuff…but I think I'm okay. I think I can breathe right now. And I can think a little. Do we have to go to the morgue?" I just wanted this to all be over so I could cry until my eyes fell out or I died of dehydration. I couldn't believe dad hadn't called yet. That was the only thing I was expecting.

Spike gave me a look. "Bit, I'm not an idiot. I know you're hurting a lot right now." He saw me glance hopefully at the phone. "He didn't call for Joyce, he won't call for her."

That was the worst part. Mom wasn't here either, and I was the only one left in the family besides Dad, who didn't count anyway. Not if he didn't call. "I don't care."

"Why don't you get some sleep? I know the sun's up just now, but there's nothing you can do until tomorrow, and even then there's really nothing that you can do."

Sleep equals dreams, and there's no Buffy to hold me when I wake up screaming. "No."

"Bit—"

"No!" I insisted more forcefully, starting to shake. "No, no, no! I don't want to because I'll have bad dreams." I realized how childish I was, and didn't particularly care.

"Look, Dawn." Spike said. "I know that I'll be having some scary nightmares as soon as I fall asleep, but that doesn't mean I should rest for a while." I was still shivering badly, and Spike lowered his voice a little, coming to sit next to me. "I know this is hard, and you can't deal right now, but if you don't sleep it's going to be worse tomorrow." He sighed at the determined look on my face. "Look, I'll go with you, and sit near your bed or something. If you have a bad dream I'll wake you up."

"I…" I said slowly. "I guess so. You promise to wake me up right away if I start screaming?"

"I promise." he said, and I nodded reluctantly. He got up, and with one deft movement, swept me up into his arms. "I'll keep you safe. I promised Buffy I would."

He climbed the stairs, and passed Buffy's bedroom on the way to mine. I still could see all her stuff, and I even thought it smelled a little like her. Spike probably thought so too, with vampire senses and all. Once we reached my bedroom he laid me down on the bed and pulled a blanket over my head.

"Thanks." I managed. My eyes fluttered to a close.

He laid a cold hand on my head. "Don't you worry now, Bit. I'll be here, like I promised." I heard a gulp. "'Til the end of the world."


	3. Gone

**A/N: This is a mix of various POV's, so mostly what all her friends think and remember from when they first met Buffy. Keep in mind for the memories I don't have completely accurate quotes, because in the story the characters are supposed to have a more vague memory of exactly what they said to Buffy when they first saw her. After all, it's been five years…and Giles' POV might be a little icky because I am not British or old or a guy. Oh well.**

Chapter 3

Giles' POV

I was her Watcher. I was supposed to protect her, and keep her safe, and make sure things like this didn't ever happen to her.

I settled down with a cup of tea, listening to Xander and Anya bickering over something trivial. They'd been at it for nearly an hour, but I know they were just trying to forget the more imminent pain. They could deal tomorrow, but for now they were desperate to just forget.

If I had only seen this coming. If I had ducked just in time to miss that spear, then we could have kept on going. We could have made it out of the country so that by now it would be too late for Glory, and all we—or I—would have to do would be kill Ben. I never would have made her do it. Never.

I looked at the clock. It was nearly eleven o'clock, seeing as how it had been morning when…when she died. I hoped she had seen the sunrise one last time.

"Giles?"

"Yes?" I asked, recognizing Xander's voice.

"Well…you think Tara is okay? They've been gone for a while…" Xander said.

"I'm sure she's quite alright." I told him. During the battle Tara had somehow, in her childlike state, pulled her cast off, and now that she was back to normal Willow had taken her to the hospital to get her arm re-casted. "Willow can keep her quite safe."

"I guess. What about Dawn and Spike?" his voice was edged with contempt at the last word. "Do you really trust him to watch her while she's sleeping?"

"No." I said. "I do not, but there is no way he can harm her, so if he makes her feel more secure than I don't see why he can't."

"I think it's creepy." Anya supplied from the couch. "Like he's stalking her now that Buffy's gone."

"Anya!" Xander choked. "That's…! That's sick! That's so twisted! That's…something Spike would do." He gave her a half-disgusted, half-agreeing look and turned to me. "Well?"

"I highly doubt that's the case." I supplied, feeling nauseous at the thought.

"And if that is the case?"

I shrugged. "You know."

"Stake him?"

"Yes, I believe that's the general idea." I said reluctantly. "Though Dawn might not like that idea. She seems to have grown close to him."

Xander was disgusted again. "Yeah, she used to have a major crush on him. Or so Buffy said." Faces in the room collectively fell. "Sorry."

A minute of uncomfortable silence and Xander walked out, looking like he was close to breaking down. Anya followed suite.

I fell back into a deep stupor. Tomorrow I was going to have to pick out a coffin for Buffy, and go to the morgue, and sign nonsensical paperwork. I would have to swallow all my fears and doubts and sorrow so the others would know they still had me, and each other.

**O.o.O.o.O**

Willow's POV

I watched as Tara grimaced, flexing her fingers a fraction of a millimeter. The nurse had gone for more cast-making stuff and bandages.

"Tara, baby, are you feeling okay?" I ventured.

She smiled. "I think I'll be okay. I'm not crazy anymore."

"Well, yeah, because if you were we would probably still be running from Glory 'cause, you know, crazy goddess who would have been full power but now I sound like I'm bragging and I'll shut up now." I rambled on, blushing. "Buffy would've got her one way or other. I don't know what I'm even saying half the time—"

"It's okay." She assured me. "It's hard when you lose someone you love. When my Mom died I thought all these crazy things, and said a lot of stuff I didn't mean to or want to." She stroked my cheek with her good hand. "I miss Buffy too, even though I haven't known her as long as you and Xander and Giles. She was a good person, and really nice to me."

"Remember when you met her?" I asked. "Not so fun."

"That was Faith inside Buffy's body, it doesn't count." Tara reminded me gently. "I met her when she was still in Faith's body."

"Yeah." I ran my fingers lovingly through her hair. "I miss her so much. She should be here right now, telling me not to worry, we're going to be fine, and Dawnie will be fine, but she can't, and she never will."

"You don't know she's not saying it now, and we just can't see her." said Tara. "I used to think that when Mom died. It's nice to feel like I'm being watched over."

"I hope she's happy." I managed. "I hope she's not trapped somewhere horrible—"

Tara shook her head quickly. "No, no way. Buffy's a good person."

"Okay." I said. "I believe you."

She smiled the way she always did, shy and unassuming. I was lucky to have her even after all that had happened between us. I was lucky that she could help me get through the grief that was ripping its way out of my chest as I spoke. Another second and I wouldn't be able to breathe.

"Willow?"

"Y-Yeah?"

Her blue eyes were glistening with tears. "I wish that I could have done something."

"You did what you could." I said softly. "And as long as you're here I know there's a chance I'll remain sane no matter how much I may be hurting."

"Same here." She agreed. The nurse came in and, smiling mechanically, started to wrap Tara's hand.

"How did this happen?" she chirped, not looking like she cared all that much.

I just shrugged. "I don't know, it was a while ago, and…she can't remember."

"Sorry." Tara said. "I had…er…brain damage. Must've fell." I flinched, knowing that Glory had crushed Tara's hand, then sucked her brain out and made her crazy. Obviously we couldn't tell the nurse _that_. She saw my expression and squeezed my hand. "I'm fine now…as fine as I can be under the circumstances."

"What would those be?" the nurse asked, popping her gum.

I gulped. "A friend died this morning; she fell from nearly ten stories up." _And hit a ball of energy and was electrocuted to death._

"Oh…." Tara moaned suddenly. "Angel."

"Who…?" said the nurse.

My heart sped up. _Oh no. Oh no, Angel's going to…he won't be able to take it._ "Oh no."

"Yeah." Tara echoed. "It'll—"

"Kill him." I murmured. "It's going to kill him, but he has to know."

The last thing I wanted to do was drive to L.A. to tell Angel that the forbidden love of his life that was the reason he fought against good was dead, but he deserved to know.

The nurse, entirely bored with the proceedings, finished Tara's hand and gestured for us to go. "You're all set, you can leave." As an afterthought, she added, "Sorry about your friend."

"Thanks." said Tara. When we got to the car, she asked, "What next?"

"L.A." I said. My chest was heavy. "I can get there and back before tomorrow when we have to be at the m-morgue. How am I going to tell Angel, Tara?"

"I don't know. I just don't know."

**O.o.O.o.O**

Spike's POV

Watching the little Niblet sleep, I actually could feel calm washing over me for the first time in twenty-four hours. The poor thing was shivering and moaning, but at least she was asleep. She kept mumbling "Buffy" in her sleep.

I don't think I ever really saw Dawn as looking like Buffy, but there was a resemblance. Enough to tighten my throat and fuel the fire blazing inside me, seeing the way her face was the same shape, and her eyes were as soft and caring when she wasn't whining, and, as I fully knew, how well she came up with a snarky retort for everything.

All I wanted was to make Buffy happy, to love and be loved. Sure, there may have been some obsession, but that doesn't mean I didn't care for her. I protected her and the little Bit, and fought her battles with her, whether she liked it or not. I was there, one way or another. I think she had me from the moment I walked up and said, "Hello, cutie.", then proposed to team up and fight Angelus despite our differences.

Dawn tossed in her sleep, whimpering and clutching her blankets. "No…B-Buffy…"

"Dawnie?" I timidly reached out a hand and nudged her. "It's just a dream. Or something."

She moaned loudly, the moan turning quickly into a high-pitched scream. "BUFFY!"

"Bit?" I didn't bother with niceties, shaking her hard. "Dawn! Wake up!"

"Buffy! Buffy…?" she panted, eyes fluttering open. "Spike. Where's Buffy—" then it hit her. "I was…I'm just confused."

"It's okay, Bit." I assured her, though I was close to shaking myself. "Bad dream?"

"I don't want to talk about it." She said stubbornly, putting on a resolved face. "And you can't make me."

I shrugged. "I don't plan on it. Think you can sleep again?"

"No." She tried getting out of bed, but her legs wobbled, giving out. "Just shaky." said Dawn quickly as I dove to the ground, attempting to cushion the fall. "I'm fine. Honest."

"That's it." I scooped her up, making her giggle. "No more walking for you."

I hugged her frail body close as I carefully navigated the stairs. Her warmth was comforting. It was something I hadn't felt for a long time, seeing as the last couple of girls I had been with were as cold as me.

"Spike…! And Dawn?" Xander, known to me as the glorified bricklayer, was glaring at me with contempt. "Course, I didn't really want to think about that word—glorified—not now. "What exactly are you doing?"

"Little Bit fell." I said, feeling a little gratified by his anger. A good fight would clear the air up a bit, I reckoned. Except that Buffy wouldn't have wanted that happening around Dawn, so I didn't try to make him angrier than he was, much as I wanted to. "I was just making sure she didn't hurt herself," I added with much less scorn.

"You're not up to something fiendish and stalker-y?" Xander asked, almost looking disappointed. "Oh. I'm still watching you."

Guess he needed a fight more than me. "Okay, fair enough." I shifted Dawn's weight in my arms. "Where to, Niblet?"

"I dunno." She said. "Maybe the couch, or chair, or whatever." She looked up shyly. "Can you maybe stay with me? You could tell me stories…and stuff."

"Why not?"

At least it didn't hurt so much anymore. Looking into Dawn's eyes was like looking into Buffy's, and for now that was enough.

**O.o.O.o.O**

Xander's POV

It hurts so much when I'm not doing something I feel like I could die.

_It was about month or so into the school year, and I was skateboarding along the sidewalk as usual, trying not to kill any of the students milling about. I was never really known for my skateboarding skills. Anyway, I had managed to successfully dodge every single person until I saw her._

_She was wearing a nondescript white skirt and simple blouse, but her honey-colored hair was gorgeous, and so was her timid smile as she nodded at someone passing her. Completely blind to my surroundings, I smashed into the metal rail that led of the stairs, righting myself fast enough to watch her walk in the school's doors. "New girl?" I asked no one in particular._

_All I knew is that I _totally_ had to ask her out._

I've gotten way past the first time I saw Buffy, and developed that major crush on her. Now I've got Anya, who is more than I'll ever deserve. I still love Buffy, just not in the "follow-her-around-with-puppy-dog-eyes" way, which I can't do anyway because she isn't here anymore. So now I dwell on other things, like my various grudges against various people.

"He's just so…ugh!" I exclaimed, gesturing wildly as I tried to explain my hatred of Spike. "You know?"

"I don't think he's that bad." Anya said. "Speaks his mind for the most part, and there's never anything wrong with that."

"Yeah…maybe." I glared at him. Spike was sitting in one of the chairs in the living room, Dawn curled up on his lap and wrapped with a blanket. She kept giggling at whatever he was telling her, and he was stroking her hair in the most annoying manner. "But…look at him! Thinks he can score one with little defenseless Dawnie 'cause she doesn't know any better."

"I doubt he wants to sleep with her." Anya said plainly, fixing her hair in the reflection of a pot she was cleaning. "Besides," she added, looking up, "Dawn needs the comfort, like everyone else around here."

"I guess." Now she was smiling, head drooping as she drifted to sleep right in his arms. "But—"

"No." said Anya. "You can't do anything for her, and besides, I'm just as sad and scared and confused because I never in a thousand years thought this would happen." She blinked back tears. "And having lived eleven hundred years, that's saying something."

"Anya, I know it's confusing, but Dawn—"

"She is fine!" Anya pouted. "She has people…and it only makes me remember how I've only got around fifty years left, and it's like Joyce all over again. I told you, death is stupid! It's mortal, and stupid, and I can't believe that even though I've gone through this before I still feel like I don't know what to do because I don't, I just don't! And I want everyone to stop getting hurt and stop dying, but they won't, and someday it could be me, or y-you, and I don't think I could take that if it happened. You dying, that is, not me."

I embraced her, since she had started crying again. "I'm not going to die for a long time, Anya, I promise. We still have to get married, remember?"

She sniffed. "Yeah…but it's not fair! Buffy's strong, and everyone looks up to her to keep us safe because clearly I can't fight without my demon powers."

"It's gonna be hard." I admitted, peering over her shoulder to Spike and Dawn. Dawnie was fast asleep, while Spike appeared to be mumbling softly to her or himself. "But everybody else is still here, and I promise that we will be here for a very long time to come." I laughed. "After all, none of us are Slayers, right?"

**O.o.O.o.O**

Willow's POV

I had dropped Tara off at home and managed to make it to the car and halfway to L.A. before I really panicked. What was I going to be able to say to Angel that would make this better than it was? Because it wasn't good in the first place, and I knew he would most likely withdraw into himself and be all brood-y for months, or years, or he would just walk out into the sun and…poof. No more Angel. From what I had heard, Angel had friends now, friends who most likely depended on him to keep them safe and help them fight evil. I didn't want to waltz in and be all, "Oh, hey Angel, you seem so happy with your friends and success and it's really cool you're seeking redemption 'cause you love Buffy which by the way did I mention she died yesterday?" He would want to know why we hadn't called and asked for help, and he would blame himself like those stubborn hero-types do. I had wanted so badly to bring Tara with me, but she was tired and needed her rest.

Of course I did go all the way, and followed the directions to "Angel Investigations", which was a large, empty-looking hotel, entitled "The Hyperion".

Heart pounding, I tapped the door lightly. "Hello?" No answer. "Hello? Angel?"

I hesitantly opened the door and slipped in. It was pretty bare except for one or two chairs and a couch, plus the front desk. Books were spread out across it.

"Guide to Portals…Portals 101…Portals: A One-Way Ticket Out…" I read from the various book titles. "What would Angel need a portal for?"

Portals…Glory…bad thought s and bad places I didn't want my mind to go to. Who knew that five years after meeting Buffy I would be in L.A. to tell her ensouled vampire boyfriend who left her two years ago that she was dead because a goddess killed her?

_It was later in the school day, and I was getting ready to eat. Behind me I heard someone say, "Are you Willow?"_

_It was the blond girl, the one that had been talking to Cordelia, the new girl that Xander had been obsessing over since he saw her that morning. "Oh, you want me to move? 'cause I can move, I don't mind—"_

"_No, I don't want you to move." She said pleasantly enough for someone who associated with Cordelia."I heard you were the person I was to talk to if I needed help catching up."_

"_Shouldn't you not talk to me? Y'know, because you're friends with Cordelia?" I asked timidly._

"_I can't be friends with both of you?"_

_I shook my head. "Not legally."_

"_But I can try." She said. "Let's start with, 'Hi, I'm Buffy.'" She waved at me._

"_Willow." I said. "I'm Willow."_

I think if I could turn it all back again I would do everything the way I did before, Oz-related drama included. Tempting as it might be to stop what happened to Buffy, it might have meant that Glory could have ravaged the entire world. Besides…she had to be somewhere good. Somewhere safe and warm and happy.

I heard shuffling feet and talking outside, and my heart started jumping wildly again. _Oh no, oh no, I can't do it…_

Angels' voice was what I could distinctly hear first. "Can I say it? I wanna say it." The door swung open. "There's no place like—" he stared at me in shock. "Willow?"

"Willow?" Cordelia echoed. Last time I talked to her was over the phone, way before we knew about Glory.

I stood slowly. I couldn't speak, couldn't say a thing as tears formed in my eyes and I just looked at him.

Luckily for me he caught on pretty quickly. "It's Buffy."

After forever I nodded. "Yeah."

"She's—"

"Yeah, she is." I gulped. "Saved the world again. I think that makes six times now...or more."

I think he was in shock initially, as he headed to the couch and sank down next to me. "Wow."

"Yeah."

"Six times?"

"Pretty much."

Cordelia and Wesley were still frozen, behind them two people I didn't know; an African-American man and a small, wispy-haired stick of a girl. They both looked on, confused as someone I couldn't see very well whispered something and slipped away. "How many did I miss? I remember being at… was it five?"

"You were the cause of one, remember?" I reminded him gently.

"Oh. Right." He nodded. Cordelia came over slowly, horror dawning on her face. Wesley followed, leaving the two strangers standing alone.

"Wait…" Cordy said, tears trickling down her face. "You're not saying…no, she can't have…"

"She's dead." I managed. "I'm sorry, Cordy."

She slumped next to Angel. "Dead…and she saved the world again?"

"With her life."

Angel was counting something on his fingers. "Stopping the Harvest, killing the Master, killing me, killing the Master's beast after it rose, and killing the Mayor." He nodded. "Been to four, caused one. What did I miss?"

"Well…" It was nice to just not think about sad things for a minute. "Three demons tried to, y'know, re-open the Hellmouth, but she and Riley stopped it. Then there was Adam, this demon/human/machine thing, she killed it…well, with the help of a spell that kinda made her, Giles, Xander and I one person. And then there was Glory—"

"Glorificus?" interrupted Wesley. "The goddess?"

"Uh-huh. Not so goddess-y now…her vessel got killed."

"Ouch."

"Not really." I said. "So, Glory tried to take Dawn—"

"Buffy's sister?" asked Cordelia.

I nodded. "Yeah." The two strangers had slowly made their way in and sat down, listening but not understanding. "She's not real, though you remember her. She's the Key, and Glory tried to use her to open a portal, but Buffy saved Dawn. 'Course the portal was opened anyway, and Buffy jumped in to save Dawnie."

Angel sank deeper into the couch. "Oh."

"Angel, I'm really sorry. I wish…" there are so many things I wish right now. All of them include Buffy being here, even if I had to watch her and Angel make with the smoochies. "I wish that I could make this better, but I can't."

After a long, sorrow-filled silence the brown-haired girl spoke up. "Who's Buffy?"

The man pointed at her, saying, "Yeah, who is Buffy? I think I've heard the name…but, you know."

"Sorry, Willow, this is Gunn—" the man nodded "—and Winifred, but you can call her Fred." The girl smiled shyly.

"Hey." I smiled back weakly, brushing away my tears. "I'm Willow. You part of the Fang Gang here?"

"The what?" Angel asked.

"Well, in Sunnydale we have the Scoobies, so I thought you should be the Fang Gang." I said innocently. "Really has a ring to it."

"Huh." Gunn observed in typical man-speak. "So, back to the main subject—who is Buffy?"

"It's a long, long story…"

**O.o.O.o.O**

"Wow." Gunn commented exactly two hours later. "Man, I never knew you had a life outside of brooding and savin' people."

"He has surprised many people besides you." Cordelia assured him.

"It doesn't seem like she's gone." Angel said softly, ignoring the crack at his personality. "It's just not something that could happen to her. She's always been strong no matter what happened. And I was there, weeks before the apocalypse. Why didn't she say anything? I said I would stay as long as she needed, and I should have stayed anyway." He took a deep breath. "It's all my—"

"Don't say fault!" I admonished quickly. "No one can be blamed for this except for fate and Glory and her smelly, warty little minions."

"Yeah!" agreed Cordelia. "No brooding over what you can't and shouldn't blame yourself for."

Fred, who had spent most of the time we told her and Gunn about Buffy sitting quietly, said, "She sounded like she was real nice, like Angel. I bet she would have helped me if she had ever ended up in Pylea." She blushed a little and sank back in her chair.

"Of course she would." I said. "Even though I haven't the faintest idea what or where Pylea is…" I took a second look at Cordelia. "And what's with the funky outfit?" she was dressed scantily in what appeared to be a sequined and glorified—I flinched as soon as I thought the word "glorified"—bikini.

"Long story." Angel said. "Doesn't matter."

"No, it does." I said. "Is it funny?"

"The end is." A green demon I had noticed just then said. "I'm Lorne, by the way. With all the tension and bad feelings I just slipped out to take a shower and wash the smell of Pylea off my skin." He smiled, clearly a friendly type. "You are?"

"Willow." I repeated for the second time. "So the story is funny?"

"Pretty much."

"It has a shining knight in armor that comes and rescues the crazy person that is me." Fred offered.

"Guys, I don't think now is the time for that story." Angel said suddenly. "I mean…what happens next? Should I come down to Sunnydale now that you don't have a Slayer? Faith's in jail, so that's not an option."

"We have backup." I said, thinking of the broken-down Buffybot that I had salvaged from the battle. "She's not exactly a Slayer, but she'll do." I took Angel's hand and looked him in the eye. He didn't move. "And I think now would be the perfect time for a funny story, don't you? Buffy would have loved to hear it. Plus I could really use a cheering up after that tear-filled trip down Buffy memory lane."

"I guess…you're right."

"Goodie!" I bounced in my seat, making Cordelia laugh.

"That's the Willow I remember." she said. "Now if I remember correctly, this all started when I got a mind-crushing vision of Fred from five years ago…"

**O.o.O.o.O**

Anya's POV

I pretty much cried for an hour before Willow and Tara got home, then headed back to the kitchen when Willow went to break the news to Angel. I never met the guy, but I here he's a brooder. Spike bet me ten bucks Angel kills himself when he hears Buffy's dead. I don't think he's serious, of course.

Everyone is hurting so much, but they keep putting it off. Dawn and Spike trade stories and cuddle—but not in a boyfriend-girlfriend way—Xander freaks over the cuddling and fights with me over the stupidest things. Giles had gotten himself nearly drunk, but now he's gotten sober again. Willow and Tara mostly held each other and cried until Willow left, and now Tara's all alone, crying. I do what I do best—tell people what's true and what's not, and then burst into tears.

What I liked about being a vengeance demon was the immortality. No worries about being maimed or killed, and that Watcher is the one who turns me mortal by smashing my necklace. I don't blame him, though, because without him I would have never met Xander, and I love Xander.

The thing is that I never really worried about death or dying until Buffy's mom, Joyce died. I remember what I said that day.

"_But I don't understand! I don't understand how this all happens. How we go through this. I __knew__ her, and then she's— there's just a body, and I don't understand why she just can't get back in it and not be __dea__d anymore! It's stupid! It's mortal and stupid! And…and Xander's crying and not talking, and...and I was having fruit punch, and I thought, 'Well, Joyce will never have any more fruit punch, ever, and she'll never have eggs, or yawn, or brush her hair, not ever.' and no one will explain to me __why__!"_

It still doesn't make any more sense than it did then, and just like then, no one will tell me why, or what I should do.

It isn't fair that one of the strongest people I knew can die, and nobody will tell me why.

**O.o.O.o.O**

Tara's POV

They say that when people die, they go to a better place. When my Mom died all my friends and her friends told me that, but Dad said she was probably just stuck somewhere because she had been evil and a demon. He said demons didn't go to heaven, and neither did witches. For a long time I believed him, but now I think that my Mom is watching me from somewhere good and peaceful. Now, according to theory, Buffy is too.

I honestly never knew her that well, not for a while. The first time I actually truly met her was when she was in Faith's body, and she was a little too shaken up to really get the time to say hi, but I knew she was a good person. Later I hung out in Scooby meetings and saw how much she cared for everyone, even me. When Dad, Donny, and cousin Beth came to take me away because they said I was part demon she told him he'd have to go through her to get to me. Even though she knew I could have demon in me (which I didn't since my dad had lied to me to keep me "under control") she still stood up for me. I wasn't just Willow's girlfriend; I was part of the Scoobies, part of a real family.

Of course during Glory's terror-fest I got to know her like a friend, and that's how I remember her; a friend. I can remember all the silly little things like how she told me one time she hated puppets, how she had a stake named Mr. Pointy that Kendra, the Slayer before Faith, had given her, how she had a stuffed pig named Mr. Gordo that she kept on her bed at college, and how her greatest wish was to have all the people she loved safe forever.

Now I was huddled in bed, waiting for Willow to return. She had left an hour ago, tearful with the prospect of telling Angel that his lover had died. I imagined what I would feel if someone came and told me Willow was dead, and I was pretty sure it was going to be rough for her. It was nearly ten o'clock at night and she still wasn't back.

As far as I knew Anya, Xander, and Giles were still up. Spike had taken Dawn to bed a little while ago, so that left me all alone in bed. I wondered what was going to happen tomorrow. How were we going to deal with all this? Where would the funeral be? Would Faith come back to protect Sunnydale?

"Tara?" a familiar voice said.

My voice caught in my throat when I saw a tearstained face. "Willow!"

In an instant she was on the bed, burying her head in my lap and sobbing. "It was terrible, I swear he went into shock, and then we were just sitting there and it got even more terrible and did you know this is eight apocalypses for us 'cause I didn't so anyway we talked and talked about Buffy and all the stuff that happened because Angel's friends didn't know who she was and then we got all weepy and I think Angel's heart is broken forever he's going to die well not literally because I made his friends promise to watch him carefully so he'll be okay but Tara it was awful!"

Once she finished gasping for breath Willow looked up at me. "Tara, are you okay?"

"Yeah, baby, I'm fine, I'm okay." I soothed, stroking her hair. She was so cold and she was shivering. I forced her under the covers, clothes and all. "Are you?"

"Too much reminiscing." She said, snuggling up to me. "A long, teary walk down memory lane was exactly what I didn't need."

"Know what you mean…though my memory lane, Buffy-wise, is pretty slim." I said. Willow was nodding and yawning. She probably hadn't slept in days. "I was thinking about my Mom again, and what…w-what dad said about her."

Sensing something was wrong, Willow's head shot up. "What did he say? If he said something mean I'll go and turn him into something…something awful! Something witch-y or demon-y, but not a frog, 'cause, you know, frog fear."

I shrugged. "Nothing important."

"No, tell me!" she insisted. "I need to know, so next time I see him I'll know whether to hurt him or not."

"Well…" I began hesitantly. "He s-said that…he said that d-demons couldn't g-g-go to heaven and that Mom was stuck somewhere in between…but I don't believe it, not anymore!"

Willow sighed heavily. "I can't believe he'd tell you that."

"I know."

"So…what now?"

"I was going to ask you that." I admitted.

"I guess we sleep."

"I guess we do."

She flicked the lights off and after a minute was fast asleep. I watched in silence for hours as her chest rose and fell while she breathed in and out. Peace was settling around me, for once in a very long time.

**A/N: So, now I'm done with this I'm going to skip over going to the morgue, etc., and get right to the funeral. It'll probably be in a Narrator's POV, or something similar. Reviews would really be welcome, I'm dying to know what people thought and will willingly accept criticism. **


	4. Beautiful Girl

**A/N: Thanks to all the people who favorited this or put in their alerts, I really appreciate it! Of course, a review would be nice…hehe. Also, I know the POV's in here are mostly random, but I was just going with what made sense at the time. At the end it gets a little song fic-y, the song is "Beautiful Girl" by Broken Iris. As usual, I do NOT own it. Sigh…**

**Oh, one last thing; I know on the show Buffy's funeral must've been really secret, seeing as no one knew she was dead and weren't surprised when she suddenly was back, but I always thought that she should've gotten a huge funeral with everyone she ever saved there. That's why I wrote it that way.**

Narrator's POV

It was early in the morning, a week from Buffy's death, and the Summers' house was still. Inside friends and family were sleeping, waiting for the sun to rise, waiting to face the worst. It was the day of Buffy's funeral.

Since Willow's visit to L.A. Angel had come down to Sunnydale with Cordelia and Wesley, leaving Gunn, Fred, and Lorne to watch the hotel. They had initially wanted to come, but with Fred still shy from being in Pylea Angel told them it was best just to stay. They hadn't known Buffy anyway.

The house was packed. Dawn was asleep in her room, Cordelia curled up next to her and Spike nearby on a chair. Oddly enough, Cordelia had become unchangeably attached to Dawn, following her like Spike and keeping her safe. Willow and Tara were in Joyce's bedroom, Anya and Xander had the couch downstairs, and Angel was just aimlessly wandering through the house, remembering things that had happened there, places he had seen Buffy, or held her, or kissed her, or just talked to her. He paused outside her doorway and looked in. The bedroom was the same as he remembered it from two years ago, save the newer photographs of older Willow, Xander, and Anya. Ones of Dawn were also scattered about. Not daring to go in he just stood and breathed in her familiar smell. As he turned to head downstairs he smiled at the one photo that wasn't framed; it was of him, taken when he hadn't been looking. It was dark in the picture, somewhere shadowed inside the Bronze. Younger Buffy was smiling up at an Angel unchanged from the one looking at the picture, arms around his neck. He was nearly smiling back. They were both about to kiss, Angel leaning down and Buffy pressing up on her toes. He knew Willow must have taken it when he didn't see, and given it to Buffy after he left.

Eventually everyone got up, sleepily making their way to get breakfast, trying not to think about what they were going to have to do next.

**O.o.O.o.O**

Dawn's POV

When I woke up the first thing I thought was, "Is Spike in my bed?" Then I smelled a familiar perfume and remembered Cordelia was there. Spike was sleeping in a chair a foot away from my bed.

"Cordy?" I said, rolling over so I could see her. "Are you awake?"

"No." she mumbled, muffled by the pillow.

"Okay." I pulled her pillow from under her head and whacked her with it, smiling. "Now?"

Cordelia glared halfheartedly and sat up, stretching like a cat. "That's just adorable. Mr. Walking Dead isn't awake yet?"

"Nah." I threw the pillow at him. 'I'm going to head downstairs, okay?"

"'Kay."

I trailed down the hallway, stopping, as usual, by Buffy's bedroom door and looking in. It was the same as it had been all week, but it was comforting just to stand there and see that some things hadn't changed. Then it was down the stairs, into the kitchen, to listen to the endless stream of chatter. Willow and Tara were occupied with feeding Xander, Anya, and Giles, who had just arrived. Cordy was soon to follow me, complaining loudly about Spike's "indecent language" and "inappropriate remarks" he had made about her.

I sat quietly, staying out of the way. It was best not to get too involved. I had to make it all the way 'til noon, and it was so hard to just get through each minute. Once the funeral was over and everyone was gone I could cry and cry until there was nothing left.

**O.o.O.o.O**

Willow's POV

After breakfast everyone started talking about things, and other dead friends, which ultimately led to the craziest stories about Buffy. It got me thinking about all the things we had been through, like when that demon on the internet tried to kill me, when she protected me from Angelus, when she had been a good friend and always kept me safe. I went from happy to sad to neutral so fast it was like I was drunk. Everyone else was the same. They'd be laughing, then suddenly the tears would start to flow, and then they'd be gone again. Angel and Dawnie were the only ones keeping up a pretty silent front, except when Angel told us about Doyle.

Tara sat next to me, silent tears running down her face as she recounted how Buffy had stood up to her dad when he wanted to take her away. "And she said he'd have to get through her first, if he wanted to take me." She finished, sniffing a little. "I think that's when I really became a Scooby." A pause. "And part of the family."

Cordelia was crying too, Dawn curled up in her lap. "I feel so bad, I was always so mean to her, I never said a single nice thing to her. Well, maybe once or twice."

"You've changed a lot since then." Wesley reminded her. In the back of my head it registered there was no longer the weird vibe between the two of them from back in high school.

Cordy nodded. "I guess….I can't even remember the last time I saw her, honestly."

For the first time Angel lifted his head. "When she came for Faith?"

There was an awkward silence, followed by someone coughing. I looked up in surprise at the two figures standing in the doorway.

"Funny you should mention me." Faith said. Next to her, a man raised his hand in a tiny wave.

"Oz?" I asked.

**O.o.O.o.O**

Tara's POV

It took me a minute before I recognized Faith, but Oz I knew right away. He smiled at Willow. "Yeah. I'm so sorry, I only heard a few days ago." He gave her a hug, and nodded politely to me. "Sorry about last time, Tara…didn't mean anything by it."

"It's o-okay." I said nervously, but he didn't seem angry or jealous at the way I had my arm around Willow and was stroking her hair, so I relaxed.

"Faith?" Cordelia had protective arms wrapped around Dawn. "Aren't you…y'know, supposed to be in jail?"

"They said I could come if Oz went with me." She said simply. "I've been doing okay, and I figured I should come, seein' as it's B. I owe her that much to be here."

After a moment everyone relaxed just a little, and Faith took it as the signal to casually flop onto the couch. I edged away a little.

"Faith, this is Tara." Willow said. "And Dawn, who you have memories of, but she's…well, not Buffy's sister."

"I'm the Key." stated Dawn listlessly.

"Oh."

"And you know everyone else, right?" continued Willow, trying to make up for the very sudden lack in talking. "Except Spike."

"Well…" Faith began slowly. "I actually know Tara." She cast a wary look at Spike. "And Spike."

"Oh…" I suddenly remembered the body-switching and my heart sped up a little. "Yeah…h-hi a-a-again…"

Spike was still hopelessly confused. "I don't know you, besides knowing you're that Slayer from a while ago that went crazy."

"B and I…body-switched." Faith explained, her eyes gleaming with something unknown as she searched his face for an expression.

"What? Oh…oh!" Spike said. "I knew that couldn't be her talking."

"B's not that kinda girl."

After another confused and uncomfortable silence Faith added, "By the way...I'm sorry. Especially for making fun of you."

I realized she was talking to me. "O-Oh. That's o-okay."

When she smiled I knew she meant it, and somehow it just wasn't as bad. I felt just a little better.

**O.o.O.o.O**

Narrator's POV

The drive to the graveyard was silent, and it didn't include Spike or Angel. The two had decided to go when the sun set, seeing as night funerals in Sunnydale were like death sentences.

When they got there only a few people, mostly from college or the neighborhood, none looking like they cared. Dawn, Willow, Xander, Anya, Tara, and Giles all crowded close to the grave, Buffy's coffin suspended over the open hole in the ground, waiting to be lowered.

At first the preacher acted like he thought more people would show, but he finally opened his Bible and began to spoke.

Before he could utter a single word a flood of people appeared from nowhere and started to take places around Buffy's grave.

**O.o.O.o.O**

Xander's POV

I couldn't believe it. It was like the entire Sunnydale high gradating class (or what had survived) had decided to drop what they were dong and come to Buffy's funeral. I didn't even know how they knew she was dead, or where to come. I saw Willow tearing up.

The preacher regained his dignity and read for a while, lowered Buffy's coffin and covered it, then said something about whether or not people wanted to say something. A scraggly-haired teen nodded his head and came forward.

"Who's that?" asked Willow. "He's not anyone I know."

I shrugged. "Dunno."

The boy walked to where the preacher was and cleared his throat, shifting from one foot to another. "Hi." He paused, looking around. "I know most of you probably don't know me, mostly because I didn't graduate with you, or even know any of you."

"Maybe he's like a vampire victim person?" Willow guessed.

"I'm Billy Palmer."

Murmurs ran through the crowd. I squinted at Billy, trying to place where I had seen him. Giles' eyes lit up with recognition.

"Billy, the little boy in a coma!" he said. "He was the one making nightmares real."

"Anyway," Billy said, "we all know that some weird things happen in Sunnydale, and when I was in a coma—I was twelve—Buffy kinda helped me wake up, and she helped me face my fear. I got beaten up by my kiddy league coach, but she found out and she made sure he got thrown in jail. After that I never even really saw her, or thought about her much. Then I saw in the newspaper that she was dead, and it made me realize I never really thanked her for saving my life." He pulled something from his coat pocket. I couldn't see it from where I was, until he held it in the sun. It was a small, handpicked bouquet of daisies and snapdragons. He placed them on top of her grave, right in the middle of the freshly dug-up earth. Then he nodded and backed away. "Thanks, Buffy."

**O.o.O.o.O**

Anya's POV

Humans are the funniest creatures sometimes. Take Buffy, for example. Sure, she's not technically all human, but she's close. Anyway, from what I've heard she spent all of high school and the two years after that helping people, and then she never saw them after that. Like this Billy kid; according to Xander, after she left the hospital when he woke up, she never saw him again. He forgot her, she forgot him. Life goes on. She just kept at it, giving things up for what she believed in, like all silly humans when they fight for a cause they believe to be right and just.

Now I found myself facing an enormous crowd of those very same people that had gratefully accepted Buffy's help and then forgotten her. It was like every single person she had helped had shown up. I guess maybe sometimes humans can be grateful…and I think that's why I'm still one, even though I could be a demon again any time I wanted.

Another man walked up to her grave and said, "I'm Owen."

"Owen." Xander snorted next to me. "I remember him."

"I didn't really know Buffy at all, but this one time we—her and her friends—went to this morgue and got attacked by this guy with a messed-up face. I was kinda into that sort of thing, you know, with all the depressing, death-filled books I read, but she saved my life that night. And I'm sure most of you remember graduation." Some of the crowd mumbled and nodded, remembering the battle. "So…er….thanks, Buffy."

He placed a daffodil on her grave and backed away.

**O.o.O.o.O**

Giles' POV

I don't think I could have said anything when person after person went to Buffy's grave, thanking her for one thing or another and putting flowers down.

_It was as if it was only yesterday, and I couldn't help but smile at her glowing face. "You did a good job." I told her._

"_And I got a toy surprise, too!" she agreed happily, waving the shiny umbrella with a plaque on the handle that read "Buffy Summers: Class Protector". She was so alive, a far cry from the Buffy that felt there was no reason to even come to prom without Angel._

"_I never thought teenagers en mass could be gracious." I admitted. It had been a wonder they remembered any of the things she had done to protect them at all._

"_People can surprise you."_

_I glanced over her shoulder and saw Angel, dressed in a tux. "They can."_

_She turned, and her face lit up at the sight of him. She nodded absently and went to him. When I saw them next they were dancing, her head resting against him. I was just glad things had worked out for her, just this once._

And now I'm again confronted with the same realization of how much people do remember sometimes. Buffy's grave was piled with flowers as more faces I knew went to speak; most of her classmates, including Jonathon, Amy the rat (who Willow timidly spoke for, saying how Buffy had saved Amy from her Mom), Marci (still invisible), and many others. Several adults and college students she'd saved also said a few words. It was always the same thing, too; they all had been helped by her one way or the other, and they wanted to really thank her. Everyone had flowers.

"Now," the preacher said once the entire crowd had spoken, "Would any close friends or family like to speak?"

**O.o.O.o.O**

Narrator's POV

Willow, Xander, and Giles hesitantly made their way up the where the preacher stood, soon followed by Dawn, Tara, Anya, and Faith. Oz and Cordelia stood just a few feet away.

"I—we knew her in high school." Willow started shakily, motioning to Xander, Giles, Faith, Dawn, Oz, Cordelia, and Anya. "I met her when I was a sophomore. She was really nice t-to me, and Xander, and Jesse." Some people hung there heads at Jesse's name. "Well…until he died. But just a day or so after I knew her she saved me from this really creepy guy that wanted to hurt Xander and I. And she's done so much for us, and helped me more times than I can count."

Willow was unable to finish, so Xander started to talk. "Yeah, she's done a lot for us all. She helped me get through some tough times in my life, and the whole time I knew her she never wanted anything in return. Never once asked me for payment."

"She was truly a unique girl." Giles finished. "Despite many rumors about her character, and who she was, she still kept anyone and everyone safe."

Dawn stepped forward. "She was my sister…sort of. We've already covered the weird things that happen, and one of them is me not really being her sister, or even real. But when this horrible woman wanted to find me and hurt me she protected me even though she didn't have to. I can remember her before she became…different. She still cared for people, just in between cheer practice." There were a few snorts of disbelief. "And I loved her and she loved me."

Tara said, "I met Buffy in college, after I met Willow." She wove her fingers through the redhead's and gave them a comforting squeeze. "I didn't know her for very long, or as well as some people here today, but I knew she was a good person, and she never deserved this."

"Even though she was suspicious of me at first," Anya began, blissfully unaware of Xander's "don't-say-anything-about-being-a-demon" look, "she accepted me, sort of. And she fought for what she believed was right, so I guess she was one of the few decent people in this world."

They all started to walk away when a thin, blond woman came up with her arms full of flowers. "Aren't you forgetting something?"

"Chanterelle?" Xander and Willow asked in disbelief.

She shook her head. "Just 'Anne' now. Buffy let me have the name she used after she…left. When she went back to Sunnydale."

Each one of them accepted a small bouquet and placed it on the now-covered grave. Not an inch of dirt was visible.

"Goodbye, Buffy."

"Bye, Buffster."

"Erm...goodbye, Buffy."

"Good luck in whatever dimension you went to!"

"Goodbye."

"Bye...thanks for being my sister, and protecting me, and stuff. Love you."

"Sorry for what I did, Buffy. Wish I could make it up to you." Faith said, getting several looks of surprise. No one had expected her to say anything.

The place emptied out eventually, expect for the Scoobies. As night fell, Angel came to the grave, followed closely by Spike.

"See ya, Slayer." Spike muttered, clearly a little drunk. "Glad I could be there for the final fight."

Dawn burst into tears and attached herself to Spike, Cordelia soon at her side.

"We should go." Tara said regretfully.

"That's okay." said Angel. "I'd like to be alone for a while."

The Scoobies trailed out of the graveyard, crying and talking in hushed whispers. Angel stood still, unmoving as he stared at his lover's grave.

_Woke today, another memory passes of you_

_Shades of gray from those three broken words_

_That unfold the truth but..._

_She stared at me, face streaked with tears. "I love you." He choked out, cupping her face with his hand, only wanting to make sure she had another tomorrow._

"_I love you." Buffy said firmly._

"_And nothing can change that." Angel said._

Angel knelt at her grave and placed a red rose on top of all the others flowers.

_I'll never forget those eyes, that beautiful smile._

_I still remember the way you said "good-bye"_

_No matter how hard I try I can't forget about_

_He held her close, watching her sleep after a long, hard patrol. Buffy stirred, and looked up at Angel. "Hey."_

_He marveled at her, how perfect she was, how gorgeous she looked even with bed head which she had just noticed. "Hey."_

_She reached up and touched her head. "Ooooh. I should fix that." She started to get up._

"_Where you going?"_

"_To kill the cat on my head." She said ruefully. "But…you probably don't have a mirror, do you?"_

"_You look fine." I assured her. She smiled, the smile that made him feel like he was alive. The smile that made him feel like flying. "You're beautiful."_

He stood slowly, unable to find something to say. Then he leaned down, kissing his fingers and brushing them against the gravestone that read;

Buffy Anne Summers

1981-2001

Beloved Sister

Devoted Friend

She Saved the World

A Lot

Then he spoke two words and walked away, into the dark.

"Always yours."

_Beautiful Girl_

_On top of the world_

_Don't fall down_

_Because an angel  
><em> 

_Should never touch ground_


End file.
